Thursday, August 19, 2010

30 Days of Insight: Day 10 (Belated)

It is now Day 10 of 30 Days of Insight, inspired by Lost in YA Wonderland. Today is:

A dream you had this week described in detail.

Maybe I am the only one like this, but giving detailed accounts of my dreams is just impossible - mainly because my dreams are bits and clusters of different things all mixed together. I blame my brain, that never likes to actually shut down when I want to sleep. I always think of scenes for stories, lyrics to songs, upcoming events in my personal life, etc etc. Needless to say, I go through this for about an hour before I get sick of it and try to concentrate on the "white door" visualization that I use in meditation. This typically works.

I guess I can describe a group of those clusters for you that I had the other night. It started out as a scene from my story, Choke. In the scene, my main character has just had a huge fight with her best friend over her other friend, who just so happens to be a guy. The girl friend is trying to hook up with the guy friend and it's just not happening because the guy doesn't want the girl. So, said girl takes it out on the main girl, blaming her for the guy not being interested in other girls because he's in love with the main character. Main character is walking home in the pouring rain trying to figure out her feelings for her best [guy] friend. When she reaches her house, the guy is there sitting on her bed and she realizes just by looking at him that there is more than friendship there - though she never realizes it before. This scene ends with the guy walking up to her and her putting her hand on his chest.

Then, we flip scenes to me walking with a guy (who looks eerily like Jackson Rathbone) in the woods to a camp site where we're meeting up with a big group to build a community in said woods for homeless people. This dream doesn't last long, but it basically just entails me walking with the guy (I call him Jesse) through the "future town" trying to figure out where everything is going to go.

The end is me at a carnival with an old friend who's name is John. We're in the line for the ferris wheel and, for some reason, I'm bored to death with his company - which would never happen because John's always been good company. In any case, I'm looking around and notice this couple a few lines ahead of us and I randomly blurt out, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say those two were vampires." John looks at me like I'm insane, but the guy of the couple also looks straight at me when I say it. Then, he follows us around for the rest of our trip at the fair. Then, I "wake up" in my dream and I'm in my bed at my house that I share with my husband. As soon as I wake up, I know someone's watching me and I get incredibly frustrated. I go to the back door and open it to reveal 'vampire' guy on my porch. I say a few choice words to him and all he says the entire time is, "invite me in". The dream always ends like that - with no resolution.

Actually, my dreams (or clusters of dreams) always end with no resolution ... probably because I'm so indecisive in real life. ;)


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